Embracing my money story
A new start ~ Painted by Peter Karas
As I sit down to reflect on my relationship with money, I realize it's much more than just numbers. It's a story—a narrative woven through my life's experiences, shaping my perspectives, priorities, and aspirations.
I have felt scared. I have been unsure if things would work out. I have also felt elated and proud.
The scariest time in my life was 20 years ago. I was a young divorced mom with 2 little ones. I had money worries daily. I was unsure of what this new life was going to look like. My head was spinning with all the things that were changing in my world. I also had no money.
At that time, I just remember holding on to a vision of my future self being an example of strength to my children (similar to the example my father set for me). I wanted to be their rock. That was my north star.
My Money Story
I was in my mid-20’s. I was a divorcee. I had 2 kiddos, age 3 & 5.
I was in an entry level position in a large Canadian financial services firm. I was doing my best to stay focused at work so I could work my way up to that next promotion. At that point it was all about getting to that next level so I could make more money. (I’m sure many of you can relate). But until then, on the days the kids were with their dad, I would work my day job from 8:00 am - 4:30 pm and run to my 2nd job as a waitress at a local restaurant for the evening. I vividly recall sitting at a stop light changing out of my work clothes and into my uniform. I was a very tired mom at times, but it’s what I knew I needed to do to support our new life.
With money being tight, it wasn’t long before I realized I couldn’t stay in our house. So, we sold our house and I moved the three of us into a 2 bedroom apartment in the upper level of an old century home. When I found this spot for me and the kids, I remember feeling so empowered. I did struggle with the shame of taking steps backwards in life but I knew it was just a bump in the road. That house still holds such a special place in my heart (above is a painting of the house ~ painted by my brother-in-law Peter Karas)
This was the time in my life that I really began to love a good budget. It wasn’t a pretty one but it was mine. The inflows were not big, so I had to be very focused & disciplined. My salary went to our bills, daycare & other fixed costs and my part-time job covered our groceries & some kids extras. I had to pause the kids RESPs and other savings. The one thing I kept in my budget was my life insurance. (this brought me peace of mind knowing the kids would have something if I wasn’t around). I had guilt around pausing on certain these savings but it was what needed to be done at the time. I knew it would not be forever. It just needed to be this way right now. We were making it work. We were happy.
This time in my life shaped me. This time in my life is a big part of my relationship with money. I am truly grateful for this time.
What do I love about my money story?
It's the journey of growth, resilience, and self-discovery it represents. It's the lessons learned from both successes and setbacks, teaching me the value of financial decisions, discipline, and resourcefulness.
In my money story, I see moments of triumph where hard work and determination paid off, allowing me to achieve my goals and dreams. But I also find moments of challenge, where I faced uncertainty and learned the importance of adaptability and wise decision-making.
But above all, what I love most about my money story is the feeling of empowerment & confidence it brings. Knowing I can navigate hard times. Knowing I can pursue my passions & create the life I envision. And knowing I own my money story every step of the way.
So here's to embracing our money stories—the good, the bad, and everything in between. Because it's not just about the dollars and cents—it's about the journey, the growth, and the endless possibilities that lie ahead.